I’ll start with the details. I’m a 5’11 misfit from London, with a penchant for rare books, fat candles and crescent moons. I was born in 1990, I’m a Leo (can you tell?), and was consistently expelled from schools because I questioned authority - and they didn’t like it. I hope to breed horses one day, because they are so special, but cats are my spirit animal. Their honeyed purrs are delicious, like dancing, and I live for the dance.
My dancing career started when I was 16 with drum n bass in squat raves, but evolved into house music on dancefloors all over europe. I chased deep beats and big sound-systems because dancing was one of the few times that I truly felt free. The truth is that a lot of the time I felt trapped, anxious and confused as I grappled with undiagnosed bipolar and a f*ckton of trauma in a sick society devoid of meaning.
Despite all of that, I have always had an irrepressible zest for life; I found meaning in music, laughter, and the power of love. Most of all, though, life made sense to me in the presence of Beauty -- I could not explain it with my intellect, but I felt it in my soul. I am, however, finally coming to understand the reason why.
*The painting in the background is by my partner-in-crime Zoe Rose. Click HERE to find out about our journey
Right now I live between California and Europe: mainly in Ibiza, but the South-West of England is my spiritual home. .
My PhD is at The California Institute of Integral Studies, and my thesis is on Time. What I do now is pretty scientific and mathematical, but at heart I am a poet. My Bachelor's degree is in English Literature from Bristol University, where I graduated with First Class Honours, and my Master's is in Literary Modernism from University College London.
My mid-twenties were a hot mess, although somehow I managed to run my own company designing interiors and furniture. (Design is definitely a piece of this larger jigsaw puzzle). I am where I am today because of a spontaneous Kundalini awakening that occurred in 2018 and lasted an entire year. London had been hellish enough before the awakening, but it then became intolerable. So I moved to the Costa Rican jungle in 2019 where I wrote, taught seminars, launched a podcast, & spent three transformative years. It was there that I was able to finally set myself free.
With each year that passes, the cosmic tapestry is revealing more of itself to me. I am living my destiny, and it is exquisitely profound. Now I am dedicated to helping others realise theirs, for destiny is inherently mystical, and it is through the mystical enlightenment of the individual that we shall change the world.
Literary art is my life’s great love. Honestly, in my darkest hours it was the power of the word that kept me alive. I found my kindred spirits not in living people, but in writers long since passed - in Virginia Woolf, T. S. Eliot, and William Blake; in F. Scott Fitzgerald, Herman Hesse and the Romantics. The poetic beauty of their words was a glimmering light in the darkness; but not only that, it was the Truth, and I knew that it underscored the reason and meaning of everything in existence. This is the premise upon which my PhD is founded
Regarding my own literary career: I was runner up in the Vogue Talent Contest (2015), and had a blog on the Huffington Post for several years. My poetry and short-form essays have been published in several publications, such as AnOther magazine and HERO, but for the last 5 years I have mainly focussed on academic material. My most recent contributions include a chapter for Ervin Laszlo’s upcoming book on consciousness, and an essay for the peer reviewed Journal of Conscious Evolution.
I am currently writing a non-fiction book that is part memoir, part cosmological treatise on the meaning of existence.
BEAUTY, CHAOS & TIME
Beauty is my jam. Not the cosmetic sort, the Cosmic sort - the sort of Beauty that Plato spoke about - aka THE TRUTH. I mean, why swim in shallow waters when you could dive into the big, deep blue? I propose this to be an intrinsically aesthetic cosmos, and that beauty will save the world. I also believe that if we are going to advance the frontiers of human understanding, we have to synthesise disciplines.
My research lies at the intersection of quantum mechanics, cosmology, chaos theory, literature, aesthetics, higher-dimensional mathematics, ontology, and metaphysics. I am especially interested in the relationship between beauty and time, and seek to provide a new ontology of time that deconstructs the Second Law of Thermodynamics. I also seek to elevate the arts to the same epistemological status as maths and science since I posit, (like Friedrich Schelling), that art in its superlative expression is divine revelation. In 2021 I presented on this at The Society of Chaos Theory.
The over-arching objective of my academic work is this: prove the existence of cosmic consciousness (i.e., God) and thus change the worldview.Is it ambitious? Definitely. Grandiose? Probably.
GO HARD OR GO HOME
I think this universe is fucking itself awake. Yes, I just said that. And yes I can draw on maths and physics to back it up.
Ero-aesthetics is an integral theory I have developed that examines that relationship between eros and beauty. It offers a framework for understanding reality, and the nature of different dimensions - specifically the "ero-aesthetic" dimension - which I argue is the next level up in this cosmic video game, and is inherently psychedelic in character.
This is a big topic, but it is intimately connected with fire and entropy, freedom and femininity, curves and complexity, cats, crystals and Kundalini, as well as quantum mechanics, fluid dynamics, vaginas and the void. The time of the Great Cosmic Mother is back, baby.
The Play part is simple - I postulate a ludic universe - that it's all just a game, and we are players. This whole thing is like a big cosmic wink, and what we need, pronto, is a healthy dose of irreverence, joy and light-heartedness.